I Married the Dragon I Killed

Lucy released Perda’s hand and plucked a rose petal from the garden.

When she squeezed it in her small hand, it instantly transformed into dried tobacco leaves and entered her pipe.

She lit a flame with her fingers, ignited it, and took another deep draw of smoke.

Perda, who had waited for her to finish, finally asked.

“What do you mean that it will become a blessing?”

He could not understand those words.

Lucy smiled with the composure of an adult and replied.

“As you already know, the cultivation of a Blue Circle is generally born from meditation.”

Most Blue Circle training methods begin with meditation.

Emptying the mind or focusing on a single thought, maintaining a steady rhythm, and shaping mana circuits.

And if someone wanted to sabotage those people, the logical thing would be to break that serenity.

“Then what is the source of strength for a Red Circle?”

“The emotions that gave birth to the circle.”

“Exactly. If it began with joy, it will grow through even greater joy. If it began with hatred, it will grow through even deeper hatred. That is how it evolves.”

Lucy nodded.

“Then what hinders them?”

“Contradictions and dilemmas.”

A person who hates loses their life as a mage the moment they lose their reason to hate.

When contradictions or dilemmas appear, emotions cool down and lose intensity.

Perda knew this better than anyone because he had always lived with that in mind.

“Right now there are two emotions inside you. Love and regret.”

“That’s right.”

“If you wanted to grow stronger by following only traditional Red Circle theory, you would have to nurture your love and suppress your regret so that you grow solely through that love. Isn’t that correct?”

Up to that point, Perda already knew.

He nodded slightly and asked.

“Then are you saying you know how to eliminate that regret?”

Lucy shook her head.

“That would be a foolish decision, little one. Are you planning to burn down a house because you’re afraid of fleas? If even one emotion disappears, the balance will collapse.”

“What do you mean?”

“That all emotions are connected by causality.”

Lucy took a deep draw of smoke.

“The existence of something negative allows something positive to exist. It is precisely because that regret exists that your love exists as well.”

Perda frowned slightly.

“If I do not eliminate the regret, it will continue testing me.”

Even as he said it, he still felt that it was nothing more than an unnecessary burden.

Lucy had surely expected that reaction.

After all, she had also mastered a Red Circle.

“Then I will answer with another question. Why does that regret exist?”

“That is…”

When Perda hesitated, Lucy added.

“You do not need to answer me. Think carefully and find the answer yourself.”

Because he had killed Valdrova.

The purest person of all.

If he eliminated that regret.

What would happen to his feelings toward her?

And then he understood.

He understood why he must not get rid of it.

“Little one, your regret is like your heart. If it is excessive or insufficient, something will go wrong. If it disappears completely, you will die. But if you learn to control it, it will become a magnificent source of power. Do you understand?”

Perda nodded.

“Then what should I do?”

Lucy drew a line in the air with her index finger.

“You must establish a boundary.”

“A boundary?”

“If you raise a barrier that prevents emotions from mixing together, you will be able to understand exactly what each one is made of.”

As a Red Circle mage, Perda more or less understood what she meant.

Emotions are ambiguous, like mixed paints.

If no attention is paid to them, they spill, blend together, and become muddy until they lose their essence.

And the moment that essence disappears, the growth of a Red Circle dies as well.

In that sense, Perda had been a prodigy.

He had transformed absolutely everything into anger and, thanks to that, reached a pure 9 Circle.

‘But this time I have to separate them.’

It was the first time he possessed a mana circle driven by love.

And also the first time regret had interfered.

Naturally, it was also the first time he had to raise two separate barriers.

A mana circuit fueled both by his love for Valdrova and by his regret.

How was he supposed to separate them?

“That is precisely why, little one, you have already taken the first step.”

“What first step?”

“Shape of Shadow.”

It was the mana cultivation method recorded within Barbatos’s Shadow Arts.

“Do you remember the phrase? The shadow becomes me, and I become the shadow.”

Perda nodded.

“The answer is there.”

And with that, the explanation ended.

Perda felt she had left the sentence unfinished, but Lucy showed no intention of continuing.

“Now then, what other reward could I give you…?”

She lightly moved her pipe.

“Hmm…”

She stared at the pipe for several seconds and then smiled.

Perda suspected she was about to give him something useless.

Then the thorn-covered vines surrounding Lucy began gathering around her hand.

They looked like a hundred serpents intertwining chaotically.

And finally they spat something out.

It was a straight branch.

Perhaps because he examined it carefully, he noticed that it resembled the pipe Lucy was holding.

“What do you think this is?”

“…A pipe?”

“Why would I give you something like that? You are far too young to understand the true charm of tobacco.”

She exhaled smoke with an irritatingly satisfied expression, as though telling him never to smoke.

Of course, Perda had smoked before.

But he had given up the habit because he hated that feeling of mental dullness.

Just as he was about to ask what it really was—

Crackle!

Red sparks danced around the branch.

It was the Lightning of Defiance.

Lucy smiled with amusement when she saw Perda’s expression.

“It is called Jibal.”

“Jibal?”

“That is what I named it. It is a magic staff created by me.”

“I see.”

“Do you remember that branch struck by my lightning? The one that would drive any mage mad. This will absorb that power on its own. Once it does, the instability will disappear, and you will also be able to use that power in its full capacity.”

She did not understand why she was explaining all of this to him.

From the context, it seemed obvious that she intended to give it to him, but Perda did not want to assume that so easily.

It could be another test meant to probe his desires.

“Take it.”

As hard as it was to believe, that was indeed the case.

Lucy had even told him directly to take it, but Perda did not reach out.

“My arm is going to fall off, little one. Whether it looks that way or not, I am a delicate young lady.”

“……”

“I am giving you a gift, and yet you are making that face like a pig who has just been served an enormous plate of food. Why? Do you think I am going to sacrifice you?”

“That seems quite likely.”

Lucy burst out laughing.

“How insolent. Did it never occur to you that I might simply give it to you for free?”

“Because the people who did that died a long time ago.”

“That’s true. You’re right.”

She laughed cheerfully.

“As I said before, I like helping women with tragic destinies. And Valdrova also carries a tragic destiny. I wanted to help her, but it was not easy.”

“Why?”

“Because she has an extremely vicious dog around her, doesn’t she?”

There was no need to ask whom she meant.

After all, that vicious dog was the one preventing her from entering that space.

‘When I return, who knows what she’ll do this time.’

Perda had already mentally prepared himself to be scrubbed again.

Just thinking about that green towel Ruri carried was enough to make him tense.

“How could I help her when that little puppy keeps insisting that she cannot trust the words of a witch?”

It was natural that she did not trust her.

Ruri was Valdrova’s maid.

Lucy was one of the most infamous witches on the continent.

There was no way Ruri would stand by and watch while a witch manipulated Valdrova.

“Since I had no way to approach her, I thought I could help her through you. Even if you are a man, I see no reason to worry if your intention is to save a woman with such an unfortunate destiny.”

Hearing that, Perda did not feel that she was lying.

He had already sensed it during their confrontation in the past.

Even though she was the leader of the witches, he had never felt genuine malice from Lucy.

Rather, she seemed like someone who, just like him now, had reached the void and become extraordinarily serene.

Was he being manipulated?

Or did she simply have confidence in herself?

If he was being manipulated, it meant he did not trust himself.

If he was certain, it meant the opposite.

He had no other choice.

At last, Perda took the staff.

The moment he grasped the blunt end that Lucy offered him, a change occurred.

The branch instantly transformed into an elegant black staff.

Its form matched Perda’s appearance and presence perfectly, as though it had been designed specifically for him.

The change in appearance was not all that surprising.

Many other staffs could do that.

What truly surprised him was something else.

‘I can’t feel any mana inside it.’

Normally, staves and wands possess an internal mana reservoir to assist in spellcasting.

The better the staff, the larger that reservoir.

But even the worst ones have one.

Just in case, Perda sent mana into it.

Crackle!

Red sparks immediately began bursting around the staff.

‘It doesn’t release previously stored mana. It transforms it instantly.’

He could cast magic the very moment he wished.

And because it stored no mana, to any observer it was nothing more than an ordinary staff.

Practically every mage’s dream.

“I will take proper care of it.”

“Hmm? Why did you suddenly start speaking respectfully to me?”

“Because you have helped me too much. How could I not show respect?”

“Hmm, is that so?”

Lucy smiled with satisfaction.

“What a considerate child.”

She looked at him with a mischievous gaze.

It seemed as though honey would drip from her eyes.

“Do you need anything else?”

“I would like you to give me another hint about how Shape of Shadow is the answer…”

“Haha. So all that praise was just to get to this?”

It would be a lie to say it was not.

Now that she was in a good mood, Perda had to take advantage of it.

“Very well. I will explain it. In the East, there is a concept called the Unity of the Soul and the Self. Turning something into an extension of your own body. Isn’t that the very essence of the Shadow Arts?”

“Yes.”

“Then if you truly believe that the shadow can become you, what would be impossible?”

What did that mean?

Perda wanted a more detailed explanation.

But before he could ask, a small finger touched his lips.

“This is the last bit of goodwill I can offer you. A hint and a wonderful principle.”

Lucy’s small finger slowly slid upward until it touched Perda’s forehead.

At that instant, his consciousness was pulled somewhere else.

When he opened his eyes again, he was standing exactly where he had received the invitation.

***

After Perda disappeared, only witches remained in the Garden of Witches.

Lucy covered her face with the black veil once more and returned to the Rose Pavilion.

The witches resumed their usual conversations and laughter.

“So, what did you think of that Perda fellow?”

“An insolent brat. He dared to speak informally to our Big Sister.”

“I wanted to put saliva under his fingernails.”

“There’s nothing better than watching a man that serious scream.”

“I prefer moans. I’d make him moan for three hours.”

The witches laughed as they shared their twisted fetishes.

Then one of them looked at Lucy.

“You seem very calm today, Big Sister. Is this your new persona?”

Lucy Philiaz.

The eldest sister of them all.

She seemed completely uninterested in the conversation and merely smoked in silence.

The others continued.

“It’s true. You don’t seem like yourself.”

“It’s been a long time since you saw a man. You must have gotten excited.”

“Youth. It’s youth.”

Lucy tapped the ash from her pipe.

Despite all the teasing, she did not show the slightest irritation.

At last, she spoke.

“Perda Valdrova.”

The name emerged together with a cloud of smoke.

Whenever a man’s name came from Lucy’s mouth, it meant he had become a target.

“What do you want to do with him?”

“I wonder what sort of scheme he is plotting.”

Lucy answered calmly.

“Find out more about him.”

“That’s all? You have nothing else to assign us?”

“Yes.”

Lucy added something as if she had just remembered it.

“None of you are to approach that child without my permission.”

The laughter stopped.

“That’s a strange order. Even though he’s a man?”

“Has our Big Sister finally become interested in men?”

“What a pathetic group.”

Lucy shook her head.

“It’s not because of the sort of shallow amusement you all enjoy.”

She looked up at the witches.

“I simply do not want to see you die at that child’s hands.”

“…What?”

“How does that make any sense? A brat who’s only nineteen would kill us?”

If anyone else had said it, they would have assumed it was a joke.

But Lucy’s words carried weight.

She never spoke nonsense when addressing witches.

“Then are you talking about some kind of past-life story?”

“Do you think it’s something that trivial?”

Lucy slowly exhaled a cloud of smoke.

“That child already erased my existence from this world once.”

“Did he invade this place?”

“He didn’t merely invade it.”

Another cloud of smoke.

“He took my life as well.”

Every witch fell silent.

It was a silent question.

And a profound shock.

Limbo was a place that was impossible for almost any existence to trace.

And yet someone had entered it and killed Lucy Philiaz, the mother of all witches.

It was practically impossible.

The witches who had been joking only moments ago became completely silent.

For the first time, the Rose Pavilion fell into absolute silence.

Each of them processed those words in her own way.

‘If I died at that time, then there was undoubtedly a reason.’

Lucy considered it another message directed toward herself.

She did not know its meaning.

But she did know one thing.

Perda was special.

‘Was all of that also because of her?’

Lucy released a small amount of mana onto her hand.

The mana took on a definite shape.

A rune.

The very same rune that had lodged itself in Echidna’s heart and nearly killed her without Lucy being able to do anything.

That rune was an enormous accumulation of information created purely from emotions.

‘Does this rune represent that child’s regret?’

Like Echidna, Lucy tried to test it slightly.

But she immediately withdrew her hand.

Even she could not endure it.

She, who was regarded as an absolute authority among Red Circle users.

She could not comprehend how a human being could contain such an immense amount of emotion.

The answer was obvious.

‘He must have turned back time.’

It was impossible not to wonder how he had accomplished it.

To reach that level, one had to attain the Ninth Circle, the domain of demigods, and use a Wish.

‘Did he truly reach that place I could never attain?’

It would be a lie to say she felt no envy.

But she understood that it was pointless and extinguished the emotion.

‘To use a Wish in order to sing of regret…’

Lucy smiled.

“At least, for a while, I won’t be bored anymore.”

After more than a thousand years, an emotion that had been worn away by the passage of time began beating within her chest once more.

And that emotion was, without a doubt, excitement.